Bonding After Your Shasta County Foster Adoption
While love is definitely an important factor in any relationship, it’s necessary to recognize that love and bonding are two different things and the latter will be just as significant during your Shasta County foster adoption process. Love can often go unreciprocated until a real bond has been formed, which allows both the foster parent and foster child a chance to give and take.
Bonding is Being Connected
Doing things together promotes bonding, but that’s not all there is to it. When a foster parent and foster child first meet, both may be apprehensive, excited, and anxious all at the same time.
It is definitely a new experience for both parties as they try to get used to each other, adapt to a new environment, and start to build a foundation of trust. Bonding means being able to identify with the child’s circumstance in some way, which creates a common bridge for communication.
This can be done by trying to understand how it feels to be confused, unsure, or even disappointed at no longer being with their birth parents. Being able to connect on a common human emotion or experience can help the bonding process along.
Bonding can occur through a shared interest of a hobby, activity, or talent. The possibilities are limitless. All it takes is a little understanding, observation, and respect for the child’s personal space.
Not every child is going to be outgoing or demonstrative, but can be rather quiet and introspective instead – just like how adults are. Respecting each child’s personality and accepting them the way they are can do wonders for the process of bonding after a foster adoption.
To get closer to your new child generally requires transparency. True bonding is hindered if either child or parent is reluctant to show their true inner selves. The simple process of just getting used to each other may take time before real bonding can begin.
Bonding doesn’t occur within a strict schedule. Each child is unique and will take different times to adjust to their new surroundings and to you as well.
It Takes Two
Bonding is a two-way street because it takes two individuals to enjoy a sense of belonging, trust, and acceptance. A child needs the freedom and space to determine when the right time for bonding is. This can happen almost instantaneously or may take a bit longer.
The whole process cannot be quantified in scientific terms, but will develop naturally within your new family.
For those who are interested in providing the support foster children need through a Shasta County foster adoption, please contact Children’s First for more details and information.